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> Funny Blog, Funny Person Pretends to be Jas Mann
nikitathetruthshallsetyoufree
post Sep 15 2009, 09:06 PM
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AND HE ISN'T FAR WRONG I WOULD THINK....
http://watchwithmothers.net/2009/07/27/big...-understanding/

•The Legendary Jas Mann (Off Of Babylon Zoo)
Posted July 27, 2009 at 5:32 pm | Permalink
I’m the most important musician Britain’s ever produced, and my number one hit single ‘Spaceman’ was just the tip of a very large, very talented iceberg. Of music. A musical iceberg.
And no, I will NOT be signing autographs, thanks very much.

•swineshead
Posted July 27, 2009 at 5:34 pm | Permalink
I always wanted you to go into space, man.
What do you do if you see a spaceman?
Park in it, man.

•The Legendary Jas Mann (Off Of Babylon Zoo)
Posted July 27, 2009 at 5:43 pm | Permalink
Swineshead – Those are my lyrics, not yours. When my next single gets to number one (and that’s a foregone conclusion, you mark my words), I’m going to use the money I make to give up my job cold-calling for Allied Carpets and sue you for copyright infringement.

•swineshead
Posted July 27, 2009 at 5:57 pm | Permalink
Listen, Jasper – I didn’t profit from the use of those lyrics, so you can take your writ and shove it up your anus.

•The Legendary Jas Mann (Off Of Babylon Zoo)
Posted July 27, 2009 at 6:05 pm | Permalink
I’m not shoving nothing up my anus, thanks very much. YOU shove it up YOUR anus, not the Jas Mann’s.
Anyway, this is by the by. I came on here to tell these people how brilliant I am, not to get into a fight with somebody who’s never even had a hit single like wot I have had with ‘Spaceman’.

•Avtar Singh from Cornershop
Posted July 27, 2009 at 6:06 pm | Permalink
Shut your mouth, Jas Mann. Spaceman only got to number one after it was remixed by Arthur Baker and thrown onto a Levis advert. My unremixed version of Brimful of Asha reached the dizzying heights of number 60 before that prick from the Housemartins got his greasey hands all over it.
And you still owe me that 50p I borrowed you for a Twix in 1997.

•The Legendary Jas Mann (Off Of Babylon Zoo)
Posted July 27, 2009 at 6:17 pm | Permalink
You’re a lying bastard, Singh. You gave me that money fair and square. There was never any mention of paying you back.
Anyway, I shouldn’t need to pay back anything to anybody. You should be grateful I gave the world my hit single ‘Spaceman’ and pay me for your continued enjoyment via a monthly direct debit.
Nobody remembers your stupid Brimful of Asha rubbish, Singh. It wasn’t even good enough to be used on a jeans advert like wot my single was. You arsehole.

•Interceptor
Posted July 27, 2009 at 8:47 pm | Permalink
Shouldn’t erstwhile popstars be having these discussions over on Downtuned.net? That way the musically savvy readers there can download their great tunes to their iPhones n that, and see them firmly back at the top of the hit parade where they belong!
*downloads Shakin Stevens back catalogue*

•Linda Perry from 4 Non Blondes.
Posted July 27, 2009 at 8:59 pm | Permalink
I said hey, hey, hey, hey….erm….hey, hey, hey…um…I said hey, what’s bloody going on here between you two twats from past it times?
I’m the great artists. It’s easy to write a number one bloody hit and I write twelve every night in my sleep. It’s like Paul McCartney writing Yesterday but twelve times!
And a Twix cost 32p in 1997, you twat of a thief.

•swineshead
Posted July 27, 2009 at 8:59 pm | Permalink
Cornershop are good.

•Avtar Singh from Cornershop
Posted July 27, 2009 at 11:49 pm | Permalink
The sky is blue, the grass is green and Babylon Zoo showed their arse as the useless cunts they are with that dire 1996 release “Animal fucking Army”.
Leopards dancing in my paradise indeed. What fucking paradise? Wolverhampton? Twats….
Anyone else want to state the blooming obvious?
Oh, and I have a new LP that’s come out! Judy Sucks A Lemon For Breakfast. Where’s your album, Jas? Up your arse that’s where.

•Avtar Singh from Cornershop
Posted July 28, 2009 at 12:48 am | Permalink
JOHN LEE HOOKER!

•The Legendary Jas Mann (Off Of Babylon Zoo)
Posted July 28, 2009 at 8:21 am | Permalink
Who the hell remembers Four Non fucking Blondes? You keep your trap shut, Linda Perry. You’re even more obscure than that preposterous Avtar Singh character.
And anyway, that song of yours was shit. It was nowhere near as good as my 1995 smash hit ‘Spaceman’. Were you wearing silver clothes in your video? NO! No you fucking weren’t! So balls to you and your forgotten band, you nobend.

•Him Out Of Crash Test Dummies
Posted July 28, 2009 at 8:25 am | Permalink
Can I just point out that my band (who had a number one hit with ‘Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm’ that was better than any of your shitty records, you twits) is still going … I think.
*checks Wikipedia*
Yes, yes we are. So FUCK YOU.
raspberryman
post Sep 15 2009, 09:44 PM
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That is quite amusing. biggrin.gif


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Gina
post Sep 16 2009, 11:25 AM
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laugh.gif funny biggrin.gif


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Spies they're watching us tonight...
quiet rob
post Sep 17 2009, 12:08 AM
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haha very good! :-D

"Him out of Crash Test Dummies" hehehe!
Christelle
post Sep 17 2009, 07:51 PM
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I did not understand
accadia
post Sep 17 2009, 07:58 PM
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QUOTE(Christelle @ Sep 17 2009, 08:51 PM)

I did not understand



Trust me, it is not worth understanding!


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Christelle
post Sep 18 2009, 02:47 PM
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QUOTE(accadia @ Sep 17 2009, 07:58 PM)

Trust me, it is not worth understanding!


ok biggrin.gif